Stop Being So Sensitive

I admire people who can keep a stiff upper lip. Maybe it’s because at times I have been known to exhibit a quivering lower lip. Take for instance my talented friend, who is not only one of the toughest ladies I know, she also happens to be an accomplished equestrian. And there isn’t a cowgirl yet whom I’ve met that isn’t as tough as nails.

As for me, I was the sensitive kid on the block, who tried to look tough despite having a serious case of trembling knock-knees. And, let’s not even talk about what happened to me at an overnight summer camp session, where ghost stories ruled the night. Well, if you must know . . . for the life of me, I could not and would not take a shower because I was absolutely convinced that ghosts were going to fly out of the showerhead. I’m still traumatized.

Then there was the time when my two older cousins had to escort me from the movie theater while we were all watching Close Encounters of the Third Kind. “What’s wrong with her?”

“Don’t know . . .” Back then, I didn’t know either. All I knew was that everything I heard or saw, I would internalize and feel on a very intense level, as though it was happening to me. How I wish I had known I was an empath, and how I wish my cousins had known I was an empath.

By now, you may be wondering just what exactly is an empath? According to Dr. Judith Orloff, noted empath and psychiatrist, “Empaths have an extremely reactive neurological system. We don’t have the same filters that other people do to block out stimulation. As a consequence, we absorb into our own bodies both the positive and stressful energies around us. We are so sensitive that it’s like holding something in a hand that has fifty fingers instead of five. We are truly super responders.” 1

That about sums me up. I am what you would call sensitive with an added layer. In actuality, I am a high empath. Now please don’t allow this word to go in one ear and out the other. “Research shows that high sensitivity affects approximately 20 percent of the population, though the degree of one’s sensitivity can vary.” 2 Again, according to Dr. Judith Orloff.

I happen to possess a heightened form of extrasensory abilities, which enable me to read an individual’s energy, emotions, and feelings as though they were my very own. I am also capable of perceiving the subtle energies from any object or location. Subtle energies refers to the unseen world beneath the physical. And from my experience, I am referring to the vibrational energy and emotional imprint from an object or location, which may convey a feeling of happiness, joy, fear, sadness, etc.

Truth be told, I have kept my empathic abilities most private, largely because I did not want to appear different. However, I was different, but in a most wonderful way. Also, I did not have the proper avenue to express all that I was sensing and feeling, which led to a great deal of empathic and intuitive back pressure.

This pressure can become an increasing burden when an empath’s accurate insights are not properly acknowledged or channeled. As an empath it is most essential to establish meaningful relationships that will allow your extrasensory abilities to flow. And it is equally important for an empath to be responsible with their innate gift.

“Stop being so sensitive.” When I hear these words, it is similar to hearing someone say to me, “Please stop breathing. You’re still breathing . . .” Just for once, I’d like those individuals who may find my behavior odd to walk in my sensitive boots. Then we’ll see who can keep the stiffer upper lip.

I can’t begin to tell you what I’ve gone through in my lifetime, all because of my empathic nature, which was never explained to me. And it’s not my parents fault, for they had no clue as to what their little girl was sensing, feeling, and experiencing—both day and night.

It wasn’t until I was in my thirties when one of my healthcare practitioners identified my personality as a high empath, which at the time went completely over my head. However, they planted a seed which eventually bore fruit. Gradually, I awakened to the fact that I was indeed an empath, and began to read all that I could on this topic.

There are six empathic styles which Cyndi Dale brings to light in her book, The Spiritual Power of Empathy: Develop Your Intuitive Gifts For Compassionate Connection.

Physical Empath

Emotional Empath

Mental Empath

Natural Empath

Spiritual Empath

Shamanic Empath 3

These six profiles lead me to question how many little empaths and big empaths for that matter are running around and trying to make sense of their extrasensory, intuitive perceptions. Knowledge is key here, along with establishing a nurturing and supportive environment to foster these abilities.

Empaths can experience higher levels of anxiety. Off the chart anxiety, from my personal experience. Knowing this too can bring relief by seeking the necessary tools to manage the heightened anxiety.

With the proper boundaries and support system, empaths can flourish. Once they find their channel of self expression, there is no end to what an empath can accomplish in life, for the betterment of society. Without these measures in place, an empath can flounder aimlessly or their actions may lead to self destructive behavior.

I won’t say that being an empath doesn’t feel overwhelming, however, through my writing I have finally found a way to express all that I see and feel. For the first time in my life the faucet is flowing and it is an amazing feeling.

Now that I have shared my empathic experience, I hope this information will bring further compassion and understanding to those individuals deemed overly sensitive. And if you identify as an empath, may you find meaningful and enjoyable ways to validate, honor, and express your special gift.

I would like to thank the following publishers for granting permission to quote excerpts from their books.

Excerpt from The Empath’s Survival Guide © 2017 Judith Orloff used with permission from the publisher, Sounds True Inc.
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